1. The nice men are ugly.

2. The handsome men are not nice.

3. The handsome and nice men are gay.

4. The handsome, nice, and heterosexual men are married.

5. The men who are not so handsome, but are nice men, have no money.

6. The men who are not so handsome, but are nice men with money think we are only after their money.

So there you are,
Again youre circling all around,
If you could only touch me now,
Strangers from the past,
Dont hesitate,
Now were standing face to face,
If heaven is the only place,
Would you take my hand?

CHORUS
Just tell me what do you want from me,
This is love in the first degree,
Tell me why, every time I feel your eyes all over me.

The phone rings. The lady of the house answers, "Yes? "

"Mrs. Ward, please."

"Speaking"

"Mrs. Ward, this is Doctor Jones at the Medical Testing Laboratory. When your Doctor sent your husband's samples to the lab, the samples from another Mr. Ward were sent as well and we are now uncertain which one is your husband's. Frankly, it is either bad or terrible."

"What do you mean?" Mrs. Ward asks.

"Well, one Mr. Ward has tested positive for Alzheimer's disease (related to memory) and the other for AIDS. We can't tell which your husband's is"

SOCIALISM
You have 2 cows.
You give one to your neighbour.

COMMUNISM
You have 2 cows.
The State takes both and gives you some milk.

FASCISM
You have 2 cows.
The State takes both and sells you some milk.

NAZISM
You have 2 cows.
The State takes both and shoots you.

Frank, an avid golfer and his buddies were hanging out and planning a 5-day golf trip. Unfortunately, Frank had to tell them that he couldn't go because his wife wouldn't let him.

After a lot of teasing and name calling, Frank headed home totally frustrated.

The following week when Frank's buddies arrived at the golf resort, they were shocked to see Frank sitting in the lobby, drinking a beer, holding his putter!

"How did you talk your wife into letting you go, Frank?"

"I didn't have to," Frank replied. "Last I night I slumped down in my chair with a beer to drown my sorrows. Then, my wife snuck up behind me and covered my eyes and said, 'Surprise!'

Dosti naam hai sukh-dukh ke afsaane ka.
Yeh raaz hai sada muskuraane ka.
Yeh pal do pal ki rishtedaari nahi.
Yeh to farz hai umr bhar nibhaane ka.

Zindagi mein aakar kabhi na vaapas jaane ka.
Najaane kyu ek ajeeb si dor mein bandh jaane ka.
Ismein hoti nahi hain shartein.
Yeh to naam hai khud ek shart mein bandh jaane ka.
Yeh to farz hai umr bhar nibhaane ka.

Tumhe Daikh Kr Ye Nigah Jhuk Jay Gi
Khamoshi Ab Hr Bat Keh Jay Gi
Parh Lena In Ankhon Mei Apni Mohobat Ko
Teri Kasam Saari Kaynaat Wahin Ruk Jay Gi.

Tere naam ko honto pe sajaya he mene.
tere ruh ko apne dil me basaya he mene.
dunya tumhen dhondte dhondte ho jaye gi pagal.
dil ke aise kone me chupaya he mene.

The most challenging and rewarding things you'll ever do...A woman needs to feel as though she is the Love of your life.

Steps

1. Choose a great wife carefully. Then...
2. Tell her you love her when you hang up the phone with her, leave her, and generally as much as possible without being annoying or cheapening the phrase. You never know when your time is up so always remember to make sure she knows how much you love her!
3. Always greet your wife with a hug and kiss that says that you're happy to see her and do the same when you leave her to say you will miss her.
4. Be her greatest supporter. Be someone she knows that she can always count on. Be there for her when she has had a long day. Listen to her with attentive eyes and ears. Back her up "100" percent! Be prepared to talk with her about how she feels, (and, yes, how you feel, too).

President Barack Obama “There is not a black America and white America and Latino America and Asian America, there is the United States of America”

Barack Hussein Obama (Honolulu (Hawaii), August 4, 1961) is the 44th and current president of the United States and a first black American in this position. A member of the Senate and Illinois state representative and state senator between January 3, 2005 and November 16, 2008 before he was in the assembly of his home state. After defeating Republican candidate John McCain during the U.S. presidential election 2008 Obama was on January 20, 2009 at the inauguration at the Capitol was sworn in as president.

President Obama in his early life: