Hobbies Destroyed by Technology

Cute Girl Sep 1, 2011

For the record, I'm not a Luddite. I dig technology. I really do. But, dammit, some of the things from "the good old days" were just flat out better. Don't argue with me, son. I'll prove it to you.

1. Reading Paper Books
Amazon.Com reported selling 22 million eBooks in 2010. It was the first - and it won't be the last - year that Amazon sold more eBooks than "real" books. Meanwhile, libraries have resorted to hiring actual corpses, finding them more than capable of handling current visitor counts.

2. Making a Mix-Tape
I lost my V on Valentine's Day. I gave her a mix-tape that I made on a "boom box". She was very appreciative. From what my little brothers tell me, sharing iTunes playlists (today's equivalent of a mix-tape) isn't nearly as effective.

3. Playing Board Games
Ask any kid if he plays Monopoly - on an actual board - and he'll kick you in the gonads for your insolence. If he plays at all, it'd be on a screen.

But more than likely he doesn't even play "virtual" board games; he's too busy splattering digital brain matter across the wall in the latest ultraviolent video game. The thrills of buying Boardwalk and Park Place can't even come close.

4. Taping off the radio
Believe it or not, there was a time when new song debuts were a big deal. You'd run to the radio and mash down the RECORD button, just to hold over until the CD (or record?) came out.

Now it's all about bittorrent directories (Pirate Bay) and P2P software (Kazaa) and file hosting sites (Rapid Share). And maybe not so coincidentally, albums now have about the same excitement and market value as a bag full of kaka.

5. Farming
There are between 3 and 6 million active farmers in the United States. There are over 80 million active users on Farmville. Need I say more?

6. Sending Letters
Casanova would've committed suicide were he born this century. No more love letters to be sent; emails and text messages full of smiley faces and acronyms are the method of the day. No wonder mailmen are going postal, postage prices are going up and college kids have the grammatical grasp of a half-developed coconut tree.

7. Sketching & Painting
Van Gogh created about 50,000 paintings in his lifetime. Most artists today don't even create one. The Photoshop-fueled graphic artist industry is all about pushing pixels around a screen. Such is progress.

8. Dating
Meeting people in person is played out. It's much easier to post a few pictures on ENTER-YOUR-FAVORITE-DATING-WEBSITE-HERE. Then all you have to do is squeeze as many smileys and LOLs and ROFLs as possible into your profile and direct messages. The thrill of the hunt, the tension of chance encounters, the warmth of live conversation are all dead sensations.

9. Spinning Vinyl
In the past, the DJ would juggle records, diving into crates like a frenzied monkey and cutting the mixer harder than white lines. These days, "DJs" plug their iBook into the stereo system and hit play. Where'd the funk go?

10. Collecting Records

Vinyl isn't even safe in the house of the music lover any more. Internet radio (Slacker, Last FM, Pandora, etc.) put the kibosh on that. Some of them use your preferences to choose future songs to play; eventually, every song is your favorite song. When did it become cool to have a computer think for you?

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