A handsome blind person was allowed to stay as a paying guest by a lonely land lady. Being blind, he was considered as harmless creature free to move any where in the house.
Once he comes back to house from out side. The moment he enters the house he starts shouting happily and searching the land lady in the house.
Plan For Future:
Teacher asks children, what do u wish 2 do in future?
Ahmed : I want 2 b a pilot.
James : I want 2 b a doctor.
Deepa: I want 2 b a good mother.
Asif : I want 2 help Deepa
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Exams:
Exams are like GIRL FRIENDS;
1,Too Many Questions.
2,Difficult to Understand.
3,More Explanation is Needed.
*Thought 1* : When we are born, our mothers get the compliments and the flowers. When we are married, our brides get the presents and the publicity. When we die, our widows get the life insurance. What do women want to be liberated from?
Dear banta
Vahe Guru !
I am in a well here and hoping you are in the same well there. I'm writing this letter slowly, because I know you cannot read fast.
We don't live where we did when you left home. Your dad read in the newspaper that most accidents happen 20 miles from home, so we moved 20 miles.
The New ...... New Alphabet for SENIORS
A is for apple, and B is for boat, That used to be right . . . but now it won"t float!
Age before beauty is what we once said, But let"s be a bit more realistic instead :
Now...The Alphabet
A"s for arthritis;
B"s the bad back,
C"s the chest pains , perhaps car-d-iac?
D is for dental decay and decline,
Once there was a sword competition & players from many countries took part in that.
From India Mr. Santa Singh took part.
First player came from Germany. He swings the sword & cuts a very thin wire into two parallel parts.
Then comes a Japanese & he cuts the even more thin wire into two parts.
Then comes our very own Santa Singh.
wrote your name on sand it got washed.
I wrote your name in air, it was blown away. then
I wrote your name on my heart & i got Heart Attack.
******
God saw me hungry, he created pizza .
He saw me thirsty, he created Pepsi .
He saw me in dark, he created light .
He saw me without problems, he created YOU.
******
Twinkle Twinkle little star
You should know what you are
The victim of an awful automobile accident was pronounced dead on arrival at the hospital, and the emergency nurse was ordered to prepare the body for the undertaker. Removing his clothes, she discovered that the young man had died with the most massive erection she had ever seen.
Unable to take her eyes off it, she finally yielded to temptation, took off her panties, straddled the stiff and proceeded to enjoy herself.
SARDAR talking on cell.
2ND SARDAR: kis se baat kar raho ho.
1ST: biwi se.....
2ND: itne... Pyar se....?
1ST: tumhari hai. . .
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A donkey kicked sardar & ran away **
Sardar ran to catch the donkey. He saw a zebra & started beating
it & said
'SALA Tracksuit pahan ke dhoka de raha hai'.
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A young boy is standing on a street corner swatting flies. Every time he sees a fly he utters, "damn flies, damn flies."
Just as the boy says it a shocked priest walks up and says, "You should not curse the flies because every one of God's creations has a purpose."
The little boy, unmoved by the priest's objection says, "bullshit."