When a marriage starts to break down, one of the main culprits is communication. Couples become separate entities again, each one shutting the other off and not wanting to communicate and solve the problem. Over time, these walls grow and grow until the relationship is no longer salvageable. Here, though, are eight ways to keep your marriage alive and stop divorce.
- Root Cause of Divorce – It may happen that couples are so frustrated with their changed lifestyle; they hop to divorce, seeking solution for their marital problems. However, it is essential to pin down the root cause of the decision of divorce because sooner or later they realize divorce is not a solution but is bigger a problem. But even if root cause is elemental, it doesn’t mean that a divorce cannot be stopped. Jot down your faults, and not of your spouse, to analyze where you are wrong and how you can fix it. Lip service won’t help in stopping the divorce. It will only aggravate it since it shows insincerity towards other’s feelings.
Your Reaction to a Divorce Call – Listening with patience is the key to stop a divorce. If your partner informs you of his/her intentions of divorce, the signs of agitation and insecurity both are harmful and will further cement his/her grounds for divorce. However, listening out his/her reasons with understanding will slip reconsideration in his/her mind. Begging to stop a divorce or denying the reasons out rightly will bring upon more determined reaction, as often opted as first solution by Indian women plagued with insecurity. Right now, it is important to pay attention as to why the thought of divorce has come to your spouse’s mind.
Counselor may Help – Counselor can give a direction to your communication and help you find focus. Many a times, when fighting for divorce, all that couples seem to establish is each other’s blame and complains. Counselor will guide you through maintaining decorum of communicating only rational thoughts having meaning and are not petty issues circling around.
Role of In-Laws – Study shows that mother-in-laws are major cause of divorce in India. Men in India are often close to their mothers and expect their wife to manage and behave as per his mother’s expectations. This disrupts the bonding between husband and wife and soon anger splits open the cracks in patience. Couples should deal with opinions of family and shouldn’t take decisions based on in-laws and societal expectations.
Tips and warnings
If your wife says she no longer loves you and does not want to stop the divorce, you may have to accept this fact. In almost every state, you cannot stop a divorce if the wife has already filed and does not wish to stop it.
The information contained in this article is not meant as a substitution for legal counsel. See an experienced lawyer if you aim to stop a divorce that's been filed.
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