Hello friends.welcome again to my world.i hope you liked my earlier entry.i am again here to reveal some of my feelings.today i just want to tel about my perceptions of the life whatever i have faced and gained or perceived from it.Once known to be the best guy of the group (class),i am struggling in the present to do my primary job,that is study.there was a time once,this guy was known for its excellence,this is not my self praise please mind,actually it is my state of mind,what i feel only,i know i am not perfect.this guy was once the best student of his school.academics,sport,drama,music,knowledge,behaviour etc,he was the one among the best choices of.but today,i think just lost .i mean that am not getting what i was meant for,struuggling with my academics very much as never before.this is just a narrow explanation of me and my condition. I want to explain now in a bit detail about my past and my journey to my present. My earliest memory in my mind reminds me of the days when i was not even to the school.i mean when i was around three years of age.the only few things i remember of that time,i had a keen interest in engineering,i think,i mean my earliest memory reminds me and indicates that.there was a radio at my home.i think i or maybe my brother someone from us broke it.and you know i was rather more interested in that broken piece than its original working form.actually i was keen to know how it worked and what those small numerous components were meant for,but that time i had only one thing in mind, how could i design it?i am not boasting bout me and not showing am genius but this is really my very early memory.i wanted to built it with my available things and resources only.ok,one more memory i have when my father scolded me when i was swinging over a swing made of a nylon rope hanged over a mango tree.i was scolded very much,i stepped to school,topped in class LKG,my parents fed one thing in mind,that is" if a person tops his class from LKG to 12th,he becomes a pilot officer,yes pilot officer is the name which i8 heard first as an officer and a career.it was abig deal for me,so i used to study for being just pilot during my kids garden classes.time passed,days spent and i developed a keen interest in cricket.yes,cricketer,my very second ambition of life.Sachin tendulkar,thus name is that one i am hearing right from that time to nowadays,i wanted to be like him,a blasting batsman.so my ambition changed from being pilot to a cricketer,fine,days passed normal,months spent and years too i grew up a little,i was good at maths as according to classmates and my teacher but honestly speaking,that time maths was my least liked subject,this is about the time i was at 6th or 7th class.you know my favourite sub of that time?that was biology yes bio,which i am away from now and dont like.ok,i got some wiseness from the outerworld,and gradually my interest shifted to become a doctor.yes a doctor was my next ambition,i knew biology is good for doctors and had good interest in that subject,so i wanted to be a doctor that time.time passed and i got to class 8th ,this guy turned again,i mean his ambitions,once again i wanted to be a pilot officer,means work for the forces and by that time i was aware of nda ,cds and all,so i started working and developing that genremy this ambition retained uptill my class 10th and yes by that time i had developed my interest to mathematics,though i never scored good marks in this subject in my life leaving aside my 9th class in which i got 98 in maths,but i was having good interest in this very logical subject,this interest increased but my performance in exams in this sub went on going down ,i got just 72 in my high school in maths,though i am confident i knew everything that was in question paper,ok thats the different thing.i reached class 11 and got my interest towards engineering,a brand new carrer ambition for me,but my interest for joining forces was still there ,so i became double minded that time,later i decided to pursue engineering.and yes engineerin is the field which i eventually adopted and am in this filed now,but still the pilot,the cricketer,the sportsman inside me are alive becoz we never loose our memories and they have an impact on our personalities.this was all about my past ,though it was centred around my aims and ambitions it was just to demonstrate to show the changes in mind atate and the ups and downs of the life,many more up downs occured in other aspects of the personnal life all of them cant be expressed,for words are limited means to express our vast and never ending ocean of thoughts.well i got happy moments and sad events both,but i am satisfied with what i am now.one very sad moment i want to share is when i failed to crack IIT JEE,for an engineering aspirant its a big deal,when i gave the exam i was sure that i had not made it and it harrassed me many days that i left out my AIEEE preparations which was following that exam,i restarted studies 6 days prior to AIEEE and i think i got satisfactorilly nice rank,i will not mention it here as i feel it is wrong to do.So this was my past,my latent cricketer is still alive,I have played for district cricket clubs,and though i dont get time to play nowadays but i still feel i am a good batsman,though not like Sachin tendulkar,ha ha ha.Well,that pilot officer is also alive,i am the one rejected from Air force selection board,but i tried to be a pilot.But yes,i passed the PAB test i.e. pilot aptitude battery test which is once in a lifetime test,once passed u are always eligible for being an airforce pilot and once failed you are uneligible for ever.So i feel good i am having at least that capability to be a pilot,though i am not.And whatelse,this once very good at academeics guy is struggling at college,once science olympiad champ of his city,Gk quiz master of all times,classy batsman of his club,and a sweet singer and a music lover,is not at its best these days. Maybe now i dont get much time or maybe i am spoiling it,but lagging in study now.i need to work harder and maybe somebody's help?somebody?whom?no,its not a teacher or a tutor,someone who is special,someone for whom i could do anything,someone who could be my inspiration,someone for whom i could work hard and improve myself.So ,how was that guys? I was not crying because i am not doing good these days ,i was indiacting that i am waiting for that someone,who.........you know whom. so,now concluding,me,once a poet, a singer,a sportsman,a good student,a patriotic boy who wanted to fly high in the sky,is calm just waiting for someone.I hope i will be back if i get that someone,i am noy sure haan,so dont take it as my promise. So this is all i have for this entry ,hope u will like it,please excuse me if u dont coz i am not good writer and we will have more in next issue,so till then you have a happy life and god bless u all,and thanx for reading this article. byee
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